jamies story

                                

JAMIE'S STORY:

The story started with a gust of wind that moved the hair from her eyes.

The tear that rolled down her cheek was the tear of sorrow full of sighs.

The tears that she shed were one of a kind. The ones you see in soap operas.

She never shared her internal feelings but shared them with the souls of her loved ones.

 She sat in her room day after day waiting for him to come, to come and sweep her off her feet. She hated the misery, hated the burdens of the past.

Everyone has times in their life, the times of failure. The times that are the hardest we all have strategies of success. This story is about a girl who knew nothing but burdens, from her mother being killed, to an unwanted pregnancy that left her with nothing but the values of life, and

The hearts of her friends.

It was December 2nd; the rain was coming down hard as hard as a hail storm. "Another one of those days" I thought to myself. You know when you go through something bad and feel like you’re the one that receives all the crap from everybody. Well, that's the situation I'm in. I went to a party with my friend last weekend and I was drunk, I never wanted to go in the first place, but my friend talked me into it!!!

I was mad at first. I guess I had a good time, but something happened at that party. I never told anyone about it. I usually go to my mother’s grave every once in a while to think sometimes, or when I'm worried about something that happened. My mom always knew what to do.

That night at the party, I was sitting in the bathroom because I didn't feel so well, when a guy who looked like he was about 30 years old, came crashing in threw the door drunk, or possibly strung out on something. I screamed at the sudden push from him, He pushed me into the door so I was blocking myself from running away he started taking my clothes off, putting his hands on places they didn't belong. I DIDN'T KNOW HIM! I was really scared I wanted to crawl in a hole and die.  I couldn't believe my eyes, I screamed for help as loud as I could, but no one was coherent enough to hear me. He then punched me in the head really hard and yelled profound things, things I've never heard before. He hit me so hard I felt a big gust of air shoot threw my body like I was shot. I couldn't breathe, everything was FADING.

That morning I woke up and I was in my friend Ciaras house, lying in her bed? I looked around the room for somebody when I saw Ciaras sitting at her desk writing. I sat up and cleared my throat "uggghhh" she turned around and said "honey your awake u were passed out last night in the bathroom, and your head was bleeding you must of hit your head on the edge of the bathtub" I stared for a while thinking about what I was going to say, I finally figured it out and said "I want to go home now I will text you tomorrow" she replied "okay boo I will see you tomorrow".

When I got home, I went straight to the bathroom to take a shower, I stood in the shower for a good hour, when my dad came home and knocked on the door. "Jamie you okay?" I answered "yeah dad just have a bit of a stomach ache, probably going to go to bed after I get out of the shower. I already ate so don't make me a plate". Then I heard him walk away to the kitchen. I turned the shower off. As I stepped out of the shower I got a sharp pain in my stomach.

I WRITHED in pain and started throwing up; I was speechless towards what was happening. I knew what was coming next; I sat on the floor wrapped in a towel crying. “Why is this happening to me? I'm pregnant are you kidding me". I gathered my strength and got dressed. I got into my car and drove to rite aid to buy a pregnancy test. Of course I didn't tell my dad what I went to rite aid for; I told him I needed to buy personal needs. He won’t ask any questions.

I got to the store and ran straight into the bathroom used the pregnancy test, and it came out POSITIVE!!! I thought to myself "what am I going to do" I was in deep crap if anyone found out my life is down the drain, I wanted to go to college for sociology, how was I supposed to do that with a alien looking thing, that didn't shut up unless it had a Binky in its mouth. I went home and went straight to bed.

The next morning I woke up and puked. The same routine every morning.

I wanted to go for a morning jog to see if I could shake off the edge, but I cringed in pain.

So I decided to call my dad and have him pick me up. Shortly after he arrived, I got into the car and that’s when he dropped the news and said, “I have to tell you something Jamie”.

 That’s when he told me he had brain cancer and he wasn’t going to make it. I knew my dad wasn’t in good health but didn’t realize that it was this bad. I looked out the window speechless. I stayed staring out the window while a hot tear rolled down my cheek.


6 months later……

The sun was shining that day but I felt horrible. I was getting fatter by the minuet. I was supposed to be getting ready for my father’s funeral but I was busy puking and waddling around the house. I didn’t realize that when I got older I was going to be pregnant, and on top of it burying my own father at the age of 17. I finally managed to get my dress on; I walked over to the mirror and looked in disgust “I'm so fat” I was like bulging. I was ready to explode; my bellybutton was portal to a new life form.
I got into my car and started on my way to the funeral. I arrived and got the flashback again but this time it was clearer, in it I was screaming then it went black. I shook it off and walked over to the coffin, everyone was amazed because I was pregnant. They were asking me if my father knew and of course I said yes, but I knew it was wrong that I had lied. I gathered myself together. On my way home I was at a stop light and I had another flashback just as I stepped on the gas. I fainted behind the wheel; a tractor trailer hit me head on. I felt blood dripping all over my face I couldn’t see what was in front of me because the stupid airbag was in my view. I felt like I was draining, I started to choke. Until I realized I was drowning in my own blood.

I heard faint sirens in the distance getting closer as I faded.

2 weeks later ……

I opened my eyes and all I could see was white and I smelled nothing but old people and adhesive bandages. A doctor came into this white room and said “hello” I barley could respond, ccccccI was so tired for some reason so wiped out. “Where am I?” I said just about to crash and burn with anxiety when the doctor replied “you’re in the hospital; you lost your baby Mam. I’m terribly sorry” I looked him in the face and the same hot tears I felt when my father told me he was dying rolled down my cheek. I looked up at the doctor and I felt a sudden pain in my chest. My left arm went numb and I could feel my body I couldn’t even breathe. All I heard was the doctors saying “were losing her, were losing her” then all of a sudden it got dark and that was last breath I took.  I never knew my baby nor did I know the life I could have had.